Even if you already know the children, you shouldn't be showing up too soon. She was married and was actually pregnant with her third child when I "met" her.
(It's a small town, so we kind of knew each other, but not really.) I was extra, extra lucky because my boyfriend had a (mostly) good relationship with her.
You're too young and cute for this title, and no one needs a complication like this in a relationship.
Take from it what you will: Wait Even though my boyfriend was eager to introduce me to his kiddo early on, we waited a long time before it actually happened.
You have to make sure you're serious and your partner is serious before you bring the kiddos into the mix.
Obviously, there are exceptions to this rule of not dating a man with children, but before you embark on a tumultuous relationship like this, you should heed my warning and save yourself a headache and heartache.
Knowing that I was moving back to a small town after years of living in cities, I looked at my therapist and said: "I can't date someone who has children. And while I was in love with both the man and the kid, I was totally lost. There is nothing wrong with single or divorced parents. But my friends back home in the small town I was moving back to? He had a son with his ex-girlfriend, who I also remember from my past.
The only books I could find were about step-parenting. Considering the divorce rate in this country, I thought finding the advice would be easy. *crickets* My relationship with this man continued for... But I did learn a LOT about the kiddos and how to deal with them.