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The fact is, married women too experience sexual deprivation.Whether you are a man or a woman, yearning for sexual intimacy with your spouse is a healthy desire.Not trust the body (to be strong, graceful, reliable, healthy) 15.

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: the most exhaustive list I’ve ever found is in the book Secret Survivors, by E. It’s an old one (1998) but it is still worth reading if any of this feels like it might be your truth. Can’t tolerate having water hit them in the face (in the shower or pool) 3.

It is not my place as a therapist, in my opinion, to diagnose or make decisions about your past. So while the items on this list are common in the people I’ve worked with, I do NOT use it as a tool to tell clients they’ve been abused. It provides a possible underlying reason that my client chose to come to therapy at this time. May not enjoy bathing; personal hygiene can be a challenge; alternately they may shower fastidiously and too often 4.

It is also the only item on this list that makes me mad.

I’m not talking about the arousal of a perpetrator here, but the reaction of my client who feels ashamed because “Something is wrong with me if I feel this way”.

(All my women clients who report this symptom admit it only comes when reading, but I have a small sample.) It should be clear that the effects of childhood sexual abuse are long term and insidious. The important thing is to accept that if ‘something doesn’t feel right’, it probably isn’t. Tell me what is sexual about a 2 or 3 year old running and giggling because she got out of the bathroom after her bath and is enjoying the escape.

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