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Houses do not do that, and neither do relationships — at least good ones.

Katie and Tom’s is built with so many structural instabilities, they’re not even sure where the problems start, never mind how they might start fixing them.

She doesn’t need the profile, though, because she gets set up on a blind date with David, a man whose Instagram doesn’t have one gym selfie, although that is Stassi’s only requirement to go out on a date with someone. But seriously, this dude is LA’s most eligible bachelor. Of course Stassi blows it because, I don’t know, he doesn’t have enough regrets or bad tribal tattoos. I think I’m quirky because I say outrageous things, but I’m really the same as everyone else in LA and I am just searching for a way to push you away so that I can see how much you really like me when you stick around.” God, Stassi doesn’t know a good thing when it stares her in the face — because she’s used to only going home with guys who stare at her chest. He is a little bit startled when the door opened and a man climbs in.

When she arrives at the date, David is a total catch. Not only does he look like a lacrosse player who does too much community service, he also works in “automated solutions through technology.” Stassi doesn’t know what that means, but do you? She’s all like, “I need to sleep so I’ll be pretty. The man immediately leans over and kisses David, sliding his big hand along the inside of David’s thigh from crotch to knee, where it rests as they lightly neck.

It’s like when noticed that James and Lala are gone, so can’t we at least get a little word about where they’ve been all along?

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